We’ve all heard of the Golden Rule: “Treat others how you want to be treated.” It’s a universal principle that encourages kindness and empathy toward others. But there’s a concept that I like to think takes things a step further—the Platinum Rule. This rule flips the script and says, “Treat yourself how you want to be treated.”
Why is this so important? Because the way we treat ourselves sets the standard for how others treat us. The fact is, we teach people how to treat us by modeling that behavior first. If we’re constantly neglecting our needs, ignoring our boundaries, or engaging in negative self-talk, we’re sending a message to others that this is acceptable. And that’s simply not true! But before we can truly teach others how to treat us, we first need to get clear on what we want and need.
Why the Platinum Rule Matters
We can often focus so much on how to show up for others that we forget to show up for ourselves. The Platinum Rule brings the attention back to you: How are you treating yourself?Ask yourself:
Are you meeting your own needs, or are you putting them on the back burner?
Are you speaking kindly to yourself, or are you being overly critical?
Are you honoring your boundaries, or are you allowing others to step over them?
These questions are essential for cultivating a strong relationship with yourself. Self-awareness plays a key role in this. You need to understand what you need emotionally, physically, and mentally to truly thrive. The more aware you are of your needs, the better you can express them and set the tone for others.
Teaching Others How to Treat You
It’s not enough to just know how you want to be treated—you have to embody it. When you practice the Platinum Rule, you’re setting an example for others on how to treat you. Your energy, your actions, and your boundaries all communicate a message.
For instance, if you want others to respect your time, are you respecting it yourself? Are you giving yourself breaks when needed, or are you pushing yourself to the point of burnout? If you desire kindness from others, are you showing yourself that same kindness? The way you treat yourself sets the foundation for every relationship you have, including the relationship with yourself.
Self-Awareness: The Key to Unlocking the Platinum Rule
To truly practice the Platinum Rule, you need to know what you want and need in the first place. That’s where self-awareness comes in. Self-awareness isn’t just about knowing your likes or dislikes; it’s about understanding your deeper emotional and mental needs. It’s about recognizing patterns in your behavior, identifying what drains you and what fills you up, and being honest with yourself about where you need to set better boundaries.
Building self-awareness takes time, but it’s worth the effort. When you have a clear understanding of your needs, it becomes easier to communicate them to others, and you’ll notice that people will start to treat you in a way that aligns with how you’ve been treating yourself.
Are You Practicing the Platinum Rule?
So, let me ask you—are you practicing the Platinum Rule? Are you treating yourself the way you truly deserve to be treated? Or are you falling into the trap of self-neglect, constantly giving to others while leaving yourself last on the list?
If you’re unsure, here are a few ways to check in with yourself:
Reflect on Your Self-Talk: How do you speak to yourself? Are you encouraging and compassionate, or do you tend to be harsh and self-critical?
Set Boundaries: Take a look at the boundaries you’ve set (or haven’t set) in your life. Are you allowing others to overstep, or are you standing firm in what’s best for you?
Make Time for Self-Care: Are you prioritizing your well-being, or are you constantly running on empty? Make sure you’re carving out time for activities that nourish your mind, body, and soul.
How Can You Implement the Platinum Rule Today?
Practicing the Platinum Rule doesn’t have to be complicated. It can start with something small but powerful. Here are a few simple ways you can exercise the Platinum Rule today:
Say No Without Guilt: If you’re feeling stretched too thin, give yourself permission to say “no” to any additional commitments.
Celebrate Your Wins: Take a moment to acknowledge something you’ve accomplished today, no matter how small. Give yourself the credit you deserve.
Take a Break: Whether it’s a 10-minute walk, a cup of tea, or a moment to breathe deeply, give yourself the space to rest and reset.
Positive Self-Talk: Replace one negative thought with a positive affirmation. Speak to yourself with the same kindness and compassion you would offer a friend.
Final Thoughts: A T-Shirt Worth Wearing
Someone once told me, “Well, that sounds like a T-shirt!” And honestly, I couldn’t agree more! The Platinum Rule is a concept worth wearing proudly—not just on a shirt, but in how you live your life every day.
So, are you practicing the Platinum Rule? How can you increase its implementation in your life, and what can you do today to show yourself a little more love and care? Remember, the way you treat yourself sets the tone for how others treat you—so treat yourself like the platinum, priceless person you are.
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